Saturday, March 25, 2017

Cal hasn’t won the Big Game since the invention of Google Glass…will Saturday change that?

Stanford is 12-point (ok fine, 12.5) favorites on The Farm Saturday, but Cal has its best opportunity to take the Axe back to Berkeley this decade. Will they? By Andrew Pridgen The once 5-0 Bears are now 6-4 and losers of 4 of their last 5 hoping for that Vegas Bowl bid/late December matchup with Boise State. Stanford at 8-1 was...

The Pac-12 is too good for its own good

Nobody else is saying it, so I will: The Pac-12 is the best, most-dominant, rife with talent, toughest to win in consistently, not-ugh-this-game-fucking-sucks-and-glad-I-watched-all-sixty-minutes-for-it-to-be-10-3, disturbingly proficient at producing NFL-ready players conference in college football. And yet, after last weekend they’ve virtually been eliminated from post-season ‘tournament’ play. Why taking the Pac-12 out of the equation is like taking the ACC out...

East Coast blasé: How the College Football Playoff selection committee’s early bedtime has resulted in ZERO West Coast representation

The good thing about the BCS before it morphed into a #fourteamplayoff was at least the computer didn’t have to go to bed early/wasn’t too blacked out from the Mississippi State/Ole Miss tailgater to make somewhat lucid decisions not based on whether you say y’all unironically. By Andrew Pridgen Of the dozen College Football Playoff selection committee members only ONE has...

Only one member of the Trojan family can fill that giant gaping hole at head coach—and that member is Will Ferrell

DPB obtained a leaked memo from USC president Max Nikias to AD Pat Haden via Apple Watch Monday afternoon re: potential head coach candidates for its football program. Most of the encrypted memo was translated from Greek using Google Translate and a menu, so apologies for the parts we had to fill in. By Andrew Pridgen TO: Patty H CC: Tommy Trojan FR:...

Helfrich in a handbasket

Like battering Oregon head coach Mark Helfrich on the message boards? Don’t get used to it. Big program frontmen don’t get much margin for error.  By Andrew Pridgen There’s a common misperception among the civilian ranks that football’s head coaches, especially on a collegiate level, have to be one part field general, one part molder of men and one part...

How it feels to be a Duck

It is the morning after Oregon’s worst home loss since the beginning of the Carter administration...and I couldn’t be more nostalgic or more proud. By Andrew Pridgen I first came to know the University of Oregon in the fall of 1993. I was a freshman in Eugene and those first 90 days between drop-off and Thanksgiving were as eventful and...

It’s 2 a.m. and Oregon Football is alone at the end of the bar

Oregon Football hasn’t yet fallen far enough to need a comeback. But the signs are there this evening has come to an end. By Andrew Pridgen Oregon Football is holding a foam-lined pint glass in one hand and its iPhone 5c in the other hovering over the far corner of New Max’s bar. He’s framed by a trio of groomed...

The Big 12 is so stupid

Did you go to college in Kansas? If so, how are you reading this right now? By Kyle Magin We compiled a probably-not-totally-accurate ranking of the power five college football conferences (full members only, but the ACC didn’t really need Notre Dame) by acceptance rates: the percentage of lazy high school applicants each U lets in. One thing stood out in our...

Are Oregon’s glow-in-the dark uniforms a show of narcissism or simply a cry for help?

A selfie of a Tron-inspired kit sparks debate online about the mental well-being of Oregon football uniforms. Psychologists analyze the fallout from the attention-grab. By Andrew Pridgen Seeking consumer and fan validation through colorful and interchangeable variants has been a hallmark of Oregon’s football uniforms for the majority of this century. Psychologists today warn the Oregon uniform’s increased need for validation combined...

Florida State Needs the NCAA

This isn’t Lee Corso's Seminoles...or is it? By Kyle Magin Have you checked in on Florida State University lately? Go ahead, Google the term ‘Florida State’ and see what comes up. In the early morning hours on Monday, here are the top three search results I found: Cook’s arrest forces FSU to confront its perception on SI.com Florida State football reportedly bans...

Recent Articles

Why House Democrats’ ultimate troll would be to vote in Trumpcare

If it didn’t mean the certain deaths of millions of Americans, this bill would be the perfect piece of rope for the Trump Administration...

Trump’s Colin Kaepernick comments on the same day he officially became...

Welcome to your fucked republic. By Andrew J. Pridgen Donald Trump apparently doesn’t like quarterbacks who exercise their First Amendment rights. No, wait, scratch that....

Quitting Google

The world’s biggest advertising and media companies are waking up to the fact that despite all the available analytics Google is opaque about why...

St. Patrick’s Day in America: A spectacle of white entitlement and...

Seriously, you’re doing this again? By Andrew J. Pridgen I wonder about people who still celebrate St. Patrick’s day in America. Like who the fuck are...

Pints and Picks March Madness Special Edition: Vegas from the Ground...

Each week, during college football season DPB’s Kyle Magin and Andrew J. Pridgen pour on the prose with Pints and Picks™. Who to wager...