Thursday, March 23, 2017

Catching Pre

More than four decades after his death, the promise of Steve Prefontaine and Bowerman’s Men (and Women) of Oregon was fulfilled in Rio. By Andrew J. Pridgen As long as an Olympic torch remains lit somewhere, Steve Prefontaine will live on as the Games’ most famous fourth-place finisher. Just 21, Prefontaine set the American record in the 5000 meters at the 1972...

Oregon to interview Atreyu and Falkor to replace Helfrich and Pellum

Hoping to exorcise the un-magic that happened in the second half of the Alamo Bowl, Oregon’s head coach and defensive coordinator search starts with a pair of trusted names. ...But it's not who you think. By Andrew Pridgen This offseason, the Oregon Ducks should not waste any time firing head coach Mark Helfrich and defensive coordinator Don Pellum and his pimp...

Hey Oregon football, never f*cking tell me what to wear again

#wearyourflannel By Andrew J. Pridgen Those who know me know one thing: I am sartorially challenged. To take down a wholesale inventory of my wardrobe is to read a normal person’s packing list for a three-day work trip: Two pair(s) of jeans, one for work, one for Friday/Saturday go-out (no, they don’t have white stitches.) Two business casual work shirts with various...

The Big 12 is STILL so stupid

Do you have a pulse, a checkbook, and college aspirations? Kansas wants you! Written By Kyle Magin We’re in the second year of our annual probably-not-totally accurate academic ranking of the power five college football conferences by acceptance rates: the percentage of high school applicants each university admits. Click here to see how schools ranked last year. I’m sensing a broken-record scenario here,...

The Big 12 is so stupid

Did you go to college in Kansas? If so, how are you reading this right now? By Kyle Magin We compiled a probably-not-totally-accurate ranking of the power five college football conferences (full members only, but the ACC didn’t really need Notre Dame) by acceptance rates: the percentage of lazy high school applicants each U lets in. One thing stood out in our...

Revised: Baylor acceptance letter to potential female students

5/19/2016 1301 S. University Parks Drive Waco, TX 76798 Dear Brooke, We are writing to inform you, that after careful consideration of your credentials and the environment here at Baylor University, you are accepted to enroll in the Fall semester of 2016 and can expect to be raped sometime in the next four to five years. Go Bears! Your exemplary high school academic records--eight...

USFS officials are clearly ignoring the fact that they stumbled upon a mass murder scene at Lake Shasta

The 2016 Slaughterhouse Island massacre is second only to obscene data overages caused by Snapchat as a parent’s worst nightmare. By Andrew J. Pridgen The internets grew a new tail Tuesday from posted pictures of a University of Oregon outdoor school field trip turned deadly orgy of careless bottled water discarding on a spit of land called—ready—fucking Slaughterhouse Island at...

Oregon hired its first black football coach. Why that’s important and why it shouldn’t be.

Willie Taggart, 40, is the first coach Oregon has hired from outside the program since 1976. The Ducks’ previous three coaches, Mike Bellotti, Chip Kelly and Mark Helfrich, were assistants who were promoted. His goal: Graduate students and be the first black coach to win a national championship. By Andrew J. Pridgen On July 12, 1991, I saw John Singleton’s...

Where is the outrage over USC AD Pat Haden’s sanctioned embezzlement?

...Are we that worn out by scandal that we can’t even bring ourselves to tweet about it? By Andrew J. Pridgen On the same day we learned that the presumptive Republican nominee for president’s campaign is as broke as his steak company, we find on the West Coast that USC athletic director Pat Haden similarly has been siphoning off money from...

Helfrich in a handbasket

Like battering Oregon head coach Mark Helfrich on the message boards? Don’t get used to it. Big program frontmen don’t get much margin for error.  By Andrew Pridgen There’s a common misperception among the civilian ranks that football’s head coaches, especially on a collegiate level, have to be one part field general, one part molder of men and one part...

Recent Articles

Trump’s Colin Kaepernick comments on the same day he officially became...

Welcome to your fucked republic. By Andrew J. Pridgen Donald Trump apparently doesn’t like quarterbacks who exercise their First Amendment rights. No, wait, scratch that....

Quitting Google

The world’s biggest advertising and media companies are waking up to the fact that despite all the available analytics Google is opaque about why...

St. Patrick’s Day in America: A spectacle of white entitlement and...

Seriously, you’re doing this again? By Andrew J. Pridgen I wonder about people who still celebrate St. Patrick’s day in America. Like who the fuck are...

Pints and Picks March Madness Special Edition: Vegas from the Ground...

Each week, during college football season DPB’s Kyle Magin and Andrew J. Pridgen pour on the prose with Pints and Picks™. Who to wager...

Things are getting so bad I’ve started listening to R.E.M. again

...And I’m not sure how I feel about it. By Andrew J. Pridgen It’s not that I ever stopped liking R.E.M. it’s just that I...