Monday, September 25, 2017

Hey Oregon football, never f*cking tell me what to wear again

#wearyourflannel By Andrew J. Pridgen Those who know me know one thing: I am sartorially challenged. To take down a wholesale inventory of my wardrobe is to read a normal person’s packing list for a three-day work trip: Two pair(s) of jeans, one for work, one for Friday/Saturday go-out (no, they don’t have white stitches.) Two business casual work shirts with various...

It’s 2 a.m. and Oregon Football is alone at the end of the bar

Oregon Football hasn’t yet fallen far enough to need a comeback. But the signs are there this evening has come to an end. By Andrew Pridgen Oregon Football is holding a foam-lined pint glass in one hand and its iPhone 5c in the other hovering over the far corner of New Max’s bar. He’s framed by a trio of groomed...

Pints and Picks Week 6: Betting PAC-12, Mountain West, MLB Playoffs and searching the skies above and the beers below for answers

Each week, during college football season DPB’s Kyle Magin and Andrew J. Pridgen pour on the prose with Pints and Picks™. Who to wager and (sometimes) what to drink while doing it. This week: #ican'tbelievehereallysaidgrabthembythep*ssy By Kyle Magin and Andrew J. Pridgen Hey Kyle, Well, it took 11 innings Tuesday night, but I finally caught it… no, it’s not just MLB Playoff...

Where is the outrage over USC AD Pat Haden’s sanctioned embezzlement?

...Are we that worn out by scandal that we can’t even bring ourselves to tweet about it? By Andrew J. Pridgen On the same day we learned that the presumptive Republican nominee for president’s campaign is as broke as his steak company, we find on the West Coast that USC athletic director Pat Haden similarly has been siphoning off money from...

Only one member of the Trojan family can fill that giant gaping hole at head coach—and that member is Will Ferrell

DPB obtained a leaked memo from USC president Max Nikias to AD Pat Haden via Apple Watch Monday afternoon re: potential head coach candidates for its football program. Most of the encrypted memo was translated from Greek using Google Translate and a menu, so apologies for the parts we had to fill in. By Andrew Pridgen TO: Patty H CC: Tommy Trojan FR:...

Catching Pre

More than four decades after his death, the promise of Steve Prefontaine and Bowerman’s Men (and Women) of Oregon was fulfilled in Rio. By Andrew J. Pridgen As long as an Olympic torch remains lit somewhere, Steve Prefontaine will live on as the Games’ most famous fourth-place finisher. Just 21, Prefontaine set the American record in the 5000 meters at the 1972...

The Oregon Ducks will go 5-7 this season. Here’s how (and why)

Hint: It’s not just Mark Helfrich. Well, it’s mostly Helfrich...but not all Helfrich. By Andrew J. Pridgen Every civilization has its rise, apex, then demise. Unfortunately, for reasons he can’t 100-percent control or articulate, Oregon football coach Mark Helfrich will be the man fingered for destroying the Ducks’ unprecedented two-decade run to big-time college football prominence, and—perhaps more importantly for...

When you’re losing, new uniforms every week make you look the guy who just got dumped and is determined to get a new girlfriend like the first night he...

...And Washington State is just the beginning of this dry spell. By Andrew J. Pridgen Oregon Ducks football, the 2016 version is really, really, really, really fucking bad. Really bad. Mark Helfrich trolling the sidelines now perma-looks as if he went out to get one thing, like milk, from the store and runs into a buddy in the parking lot and they...

Florida State Needs the NCAA

This isn’t Lee Corso's Seminoles...or is it? By Kyle Magin Have you checked in on Florida State University lately? Go ahead, Google the term ‘Florida State’ and see what comes up. In the early morning hours on Monday, here are the top three search results I found: Cook’s arrest forces FSU to confront its perception on SI.com Florida State football reportedly bans...

The Big 12 is so stupid

Did you go to college in Kansas? If so, how are you reading this right now? By Kyle Magin We compiled a probably-not-totally-accurate ranking of the power five college football conferences (full members only, but the ACC didn’t really need Notre Dame) by acceptance rates: the percentage of lazy high school applicants each U lets in. One thing stood out in our...

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