Saturday, May 27, 2017

March Madness 2016: Ranking Conference Tournament Sites

March Madness kicks off from coast to coast this week with league men’s basketball tournaments. These might be the better option for travel and viewing than heading to the big show later this month--more teams, better chances for your team to win, cheaper/more intimate venues. We’ve ranked every conference tournament location by desirability. Written by Kyle Magin 1) Home sites--America East,...

USFS officials are clearly ignoring the fact that they stumbled upon a mass murder scene at Lake Shasta

The 2016 Slaughterhouse Island massacre is second only to obscene data overages caused by Snapchat as a parent’s worst nightmare. By Andrew J. Pridgen The internets grew a new tail Tuesday from posted pictures of a University of Oregon outdoor school field trip turned deadly orgy of careless bottled water discarding on a spit of land called—ready—fucking Slaughterhouse Island at...

East Coast blasé: How the College Football Playoff selection committee’s early bedtime has resulted in ZERO West Coast representation

The good thing about the BCS before it morphed into a #fourteamplayoff was at least the computer didn’t have to go to bed early/wasn’t too blacked out from the Mississippi State/Ole Miss tailgater to make somewhat lucid decisions not based on whether you say y’all unironically. By Andrew Pridgen Of the dozen College Football Playoff selection committee members only ONE has...

The Imperiousness of the NCAA

It's time to root for the amateurs to get paid like professionals. By Kyle Magin I felt a tiny, cheap thrill when I heard the University of Texas basketball program is under NCAA investigation for academic fraud. A caveman emotion—suppressed like the urge to laugh when somebody gets kicked in the nuts or a cop steps in shit when he’s trying to...

Denzel Valentine is Incomparable–Seriously, Don’t Try

Moving on to college hoops, this season's biggest story is Michigan State's senior point-forward-heir-to-the-throne Denzel Valentine. What's about to unfold over the next 90 days is a showcase of Valentine—both prototypical and atypical in comparison to the Spartan greats.  Written by Kyle Magin Denzel Valentine is a poor man’s Draymond Green and a soul-crushingly, Kirkland socks darning-ly broke man’s Magic Johnson. That’s...

The NCAA’s latest multi-billion-dollar TV deal is the surest sign yet collegiate athletes must be paid…not enslaved

The rule of thumb for the NCAA when describing signing TV deals greater than that of the GNP of Jamaica or Brunei is that it’s a good thing, for the sport, for the schools and for the conferences. They’re careful not to say it’s good for the athletes. Because it’s not. By Andrew J. Pridgen Imagine for a moment that you run...

Florida State Needs the NCAA

This isn’t Lee Corso's Seminoles...or is it? By Kyle Magin Have you checked in on Florida State University lately? Go ahead, Google the term ‘Florida State’ and see what comes up. In the early morning hours on Monday, here are the top three search results I found: Cook’s arrest forces FSU to confront its perception on SI.com Florida State football reportedly bans...

Catching Pre

More than four decades after his death, the promise of Steve Prefontaine and Bowerman’s Men (and Women) of Oregon was fulfilled in Rio. By Andrew J. Pridgen As long as an Olympic torch remains lit somewhere, Steve Prefontaine will live on as the Games’ most famous fourth-place finisher. Just 21, Prefontaine set the American record in the 5000 meters at the 1972...

Hey Oregon football, never f*cking tell me what to wear again

#wearyourflannel By Andrew J. Pridgen Those who know me know one thing: I am sartorially challenged. To take down a wholesale inventory of my wardrobe is to read a normal person’s packing list for a three-day work trip: Two pair(s) of jeans, one for work, one for Friday/Saturday go-out (no, they don’t have white stitches.) Two business casual work shirts with various...

These college football coaches bathe in smarm

College Football’s moral high ground stands roughly 7 circles deep, which is apparently still tall enough to preach from. Written By Kyle Magin The college football recruiting game is a well-acknowledged cesspool. Hordes of assistants chasing a seven-figure head coaching contract head into some of America’s poorest neighborhoods to recruit its best athletes to beat the living shit out of one...

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