Wednesday, September 20, 2017

USFS officials are clearly ignoring the fact that they stumbled upon a mass murder scene at Lake Shasta

The 2016 Slaughterhouse Island massacre is second only to obscene data overages caused by Snapchat as a parent’s worst nightmare. By Andrew J. Pridgen The internets grew a new tail Tuesday from posted pictures of a University of Oregon outdoor school field trip turned deadly orgy of careless bottled water discarding on a spit of land called—ready—fucking Slaughterhouse Island at...

Revised: Baylor acceptance letter to potential female students

5/19/2016 1301 S. University Parks Drive Waco, TX 76798 Dear Brooke, We are writing to inform you, that after careful consideration of your credentials and the environment here at Baylor University, you are accepted to enroll in the Fall semester of 2016 and can expect to be raped sometime in the next four to five years. Go Bears! Your exemplary high school academic records--eight...

The NCAA’s latest multi-billion-dollar TV deal is the surest sign yet collegiate athletes must be paid…not enslaved

The rule of thumb for the NCAA when describing signing TV deals greater than that of the GNP of Jamaica or Brunei is that it’s a good thing, for the sport, for the schools and for the conferences. They’re careful not to say it’s good for the athletes. Because it’s not. By Andrew J. Pridgen Imagine for a moment that you run...

These college football coaches bathe in smarm

College Football’s moral high ground stands roughly 7 circles deep, which is apparently still tall enough to preach from. Written By Kyle Magin The college football recruiting game is a well-acknowledged cesspool. Hordes of assistants chasing a seven-figure head coaching contract head into some of America’s poorest neighborhoods to recruit its best athletes to beat the living shit out of one...

16 boring facts about the most boring Sweet 16 ever

...and no, the fact that games are being played in Anaheim isn't even one of 'em.  By Andrew J. Pridgen It’s OK to uncrumple your bracket now. Even if Middle Tennessee and Stephen F. Austin and Northern Iowa aren’t done giving you night sweats, they’ve been vanquished and in their place, a bunch of favorites, a bunch of teams used to...

NCAA March Madness opening weekend as told by guys texting about how f*cked their brackets are

Your tournament is over the first weekend. You are not alone. By Andrew J. Pridgen Thursday noon Group text begins: PETER: UConn. Whoa. Who had Colorado? CHRIS: I did. MATT: Fucking idiot. JUSTIN: Bold move. You must’ve not seen the shitty team through all the smoke. CHRIS: LOL MATT: Save your LOLs for the chick you’re trying to convince you own a start up. MATT L.: Who’s got Baylor? CHRIS:...

March Madness 2016: Ranking Conference Tournament Sites

March Madness kicks off from coast to coast this week with league men’s basketball tournaments. These might be the better option for travel and viewing than heading to the big show later this month--more teams, better chances for your team to win, cheaper/more intimate venues. We’ve ranked every conference tournament location by desirability. Written by Kyle Magin 1) Home sites--America East,...

Not my College Football Championship

ESPN prepares for another the biggest rating’s disaster of this bowl season Monday, this time at the hands of the Deep South. By Andrew J. Pridgen Until about  8:18 p.m. PST New Year’s Eve 2015, my interest in this year’s four-team college football playoff could have been described as moderately bemused to waning: something between season three and beyond of...

Oregon to interview Atreyu and Falkor to replace Helfrich and Pellum

Hoping to exorcise the un-magic that happened in the second half of the Alamo Bowl, Oregon’s head coach and defensive coordinator search starts with a pair of trusted names. ...But it's not who you think. By Andrew Pridgen This offseason, the Oregon Ducks should not waste any time firing head coach Mark Helfrich and defensive coordinator Don Pellum and his pimp...

In Defense of True Amateurism: College Hockey’s Troublesome Heart

College hockey is being held back by it's own blithe spirit of the actual joy of sport. But how long will it stay uncorrupted? An examination. Written by Kyle Magin College hockey displays all the telltale signs of desiring major sport status. New arenas, brawny new leagues, TV deals and rosters chock full of pro prospects make the sport as viable,...

Recent Articles

California Baseball Weekly: This Is It

Every week during the 2017 season, we’ll check in with California’s five MLB teams. Who’s up? Who’s down? Who has the cheapest ticket this...

Pints and Picks Week 3: It certainly doesn’t get any better...

Each week, during college football season DPB’s Kyle Magin and Andrew J. Pridgen pour on the prose with Pints and Picks™. Who to wager...

ESPN is wrong again, this time on the wrong side of...

ESPN gripping for advertiser dollars doesn’t realize that censuring an employee for speaking the truth only further alienates the majority of its viewers. By Andrew...

9/11/17

Paul K. Sloan died on the 89th floor South Tower of the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001. Donations to the memorial fund...

Pints and Picks Week 2: They will see us waving from...

Each week, during college football season DPB’s Kyle Magin and Andrew J. Pridgen pour on the prose with Pints and Picks™. Who to wager...