Friday, April 28, 2017

Using a soldier’s preventable death for an applause line — welcome to the unbearable irony of the Trump presidency

Or, Van Jones, what the fuck is wrong with you? By Andrew J. Pridgen President Donald J. Trump enjoyed the first two minutes of love during his young but embattled administration during Tuesday’s prime time State of the Union-style speech to a joint session of Congress. The administration, which has thus far been pockmarked by a steady flow of lies (there were...

Death of the Press Box’s 16 biggest posts of 2016

It was the worst of times and then times got fucking worse. By Andrew J. Pridgen and Kyle Magin In hindsight we might think about how cute and quaint our complaints of this year really were with no world wars, no internment camps, no jailings of dissenters and not having to say sentences like, “I can’t believe they bombed my Starbucks...

The Earth is thawing out the next five unstoppable human-destroying plagues at this very moment and all people can talk about is effing Donald Trump, Ryan Lochte and Colin...

...We are all guilty I suppose. By Andrew J. Pridgen We peeps do a really good job of really fucking up priorities on a regular basis. Owe three months rent? I’ll just put that jacket on the card….and maybe some T-bell. Hello Crunchy Cheesy Core Burrito™. Building’s burning down? Where the fuck is my phone? (Have you seen my fucking phone?) Can we sit...

Trump is pissed off that #GoldenShowers is a thing. But now we know the truth, that he’d much rather be pissed on

The president-elect becomes the living embodiment of the last few drips after you zip up. By Andrew J. Pridgen Not so many years ago, I defended the scandalized Tiger Woods’ right to have his personal matters kept private. Woods, before injuries and mental deterioration took him out of golf’s conversation, was his generation’s greatest athlete and ambassador. A stormy night in...

It’s up to you Utah to do the right thing on Election Day

Save your state. Save the world. By Andrew J. Pridgen My favorite Mormon joke goes a little something like this: Q: Why do you always take two Mormons fishing? A: Because just one will drink all your beer. I had the rare privilege of living in Utah for a few years at the beginning of this decade, both in Park City and Salt...

Pay For Your Own Goddamn Beach House

My tax dollars. Your luxury properties. Written by Kyle Magin If you choose to live in a glass-walled beachfront home with a cutesy name like ‘Sandy Bottoms’ on the Outer Banks or Big Pine Key or any of America’s thousand other coastal retreats for Baby Boomers, you’d think you’d have to assume the risk of climate change-fueled tides ripping that sumbitch...

The mistakes we made

I volunteered for Hillary and here are my takeaways. By Andrew J. Pridgen I was texting with my sister yesterday and she hit on something when she said with any tragedy you basically don't see it coming and are shocked, then devastated and then you begin to pick up the pieces. The problem with this is election is it’s not a...

If you must shop on Friday, shop Patagonia

Patagonia is giving 100% of its Black Friday sales to eco-charities. Form-fitting fleece pullovers that match your Subaru and a PR coup, what’s not to love? By Andrew J. Pridgen For the entirety of this decade up until this time last month, I worked for an e-commerce firm. The melt into a chair that was never set quite right in front...

Above the law

Donald Trump’s inability to host a single press conference as president-elect is reason enough for the Electoral College to install another leader. By Andrew J. Pridgen President-elect Donald Trump has not held a press conference in more than 130 days. That’s one-third of a year since the presumptive leader of the free world has had the cajones to face those in...

Trump Nation’s uprising would soon be undone by its own absence of physical well-being

We used to be a country defined by physical and mental fitness. For a growing swelling portion of the population, that is no longer the case. By Andrew J. Pridgen Republican nominee Donald J. Trump and the fringe masses of anti- basic human decency proles he’s whipped into a relatively dangerous mass frenzy have one thing in common. And surprisingly, it’s...

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