Monday, April 24, 2017

Sorry bro, Olivia Munn did not break up with Aaron Rodgers to date you

...Just wanted to clarify before you go down a Google Maps rabbit hole to coordinate her location based on her last dozen tweets. By Andrew J. Pridgen This has happened throughout time. When Romeo and Juliet were on the rocks, Paris Paul Rudd was waiting in the wings. When Antony wasn’t quite seeing it Cleopatra’s way, Brutus and Cassius were there to...

Why it’s OK to root for present-day San Francisco to fail even if (especially if) you’re from there

A gated community. A city that is becoming uniformly wealthy, out of reach and out of touch. Too much reclaimed wood. Too many high-backed chairs. Teardrop light fixtures, everywhere. Soulless where there used to be a soul. Blank screens where there used to be imagination...Some shitty tapas place called Bask (get it, it's Basque!) where there used to be...

St. Patrick’s Day in America: A spectacle of white entitlement and assholery

Seriously, you’re doing this again? By Andrew J. Pridgen I wonder about people who still celebrate St. Patrick’s day in America. Like who the fuck are you and why do you give a shit? More importantly, why do you think everyone else needs to give a shit about you and your hammered ars? ...Also, you realize it’s a day of religious contemplation,...

HBO’s Any Given Wednesday with Bill Simmons is objectively bad, but not for obvious reasons

The boy-king of sports and pop culture chat is now an older man who has run out of ideas ...and apparently wardrobe and set options. Update: HBO announced Friday, Nov. 4 that the last episode of the show, “Any Given Wednesday,” would be broadcast next week, just four and a half months after its debut. The show had poor...

The NFL Draft Day Drinking Game

I don’t know much about the NFL Draft other than it’s a thinly veiled metaphor for slavery. By Andrew Pridgen NFL players are systematically chosen by “owners” after they’ve been processed in a “combine” then they’re dressed up and fussed over by a bunch of rich white guys who sell them into lives of indentured servitude and abandon them when their...

Pints and Picks Week 11: Road Trip!

Each week, during college football season DPB’s Kyle Magin and Andrew J. Pridgen pour on the prose with Pints and Picks™. Who to wager and what to drink while doing it. This week: Road Trip. Kyle, Holy cow! Have I got a Saturday planned. So, about a half-decade ago, I fled Park City in my Forester with exactly $3.78 in loose change...

He may be suspended from the NFL but he still shows up on a Wheaties box

Wheaties features a convicted child-abuser on latest box. By Andrew Pridgen There is plenty of scary business going on at the grocery store. That new green-labeled cola (Coke Life!) with a main ingredient called Stevia which sounds like a week-one vote-off on RuPaul’s Drag Race but is actually an extract from a South American plant from the Asteraceae family. Even...

I am none of the surprised that 2016 stole Alan Thicke from us just under the wire

…Oh I will waste another minute on my crying tonight. By Andrew J. Pridgen Saturday, August 27, 2016 might be one of the greatest sports days of my life. It started in an Uber in West Hollywood looking for a liquor store that sold Colt 45 Blast en route to Dodger Stadium and ended with a toast at famed hole-in-the...

Disturbing Bridger Bowl Gaper caper movie clip leaked online

Ed Note: In the first truly meta moment of the new year, a clip from a to-be-released film about a computer hacker who is set up by his bosses to meet his ultimate demise at a Montana ski resort leaked Monday. Below, the clip from the docudrama (working title: “Melt Down”) as well as the movie’s original pitch and...

Your Artisanal Poutine is Offensive

Written By Kyle Magin In the course of my 9-to-5 as an editor, I come across a number of menus from farm-to-table/fusion/nouveau expensive restaurants. In case that’s not descriptive enough for you, these are the restaurants where the childfree/empty nesters who want to be cool head to in (name of town/neighborhood here that imploded after 2008) on the waterfront that...

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A Guy on Girls

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A thank you to Trump voters as we arrive on the...

No, really. THANK YOU. By Andrew J. Pridgen Dear Trump Voter, Thank you all you racists, misogynists, robber barons, opioid addicts, quasi-literates, out-of-the-closet white supremacists, feckless...

How new North Carolina legislation to penalize public universities and the...

New North Carolina legislation threatens to kick North Carolina and NC State out of the ACC if the schools decide to act humanely against...